Thursday, January 13, 2011

Random Bits: "Where You Rule" (tm)

Japan House on Appleway in Cd'A was recently listed as "For Sale" on Craigslist. Unlike last month's loss of Takara, not a single salty teardrop rolled down the cheek of anybody anywhere at this news. The spectral Appleway sushi spot was one of this town's biggest unsolved mysteries. In their three (?) years of existence, I never talked to a single soul who bothered to stop in and sample whatever it was they did. Like most people, I was too frightened by the fact that the place only ever had maybe two customers sitting inside every time I'd drive by and think about it. Or were they two ghosts? We'll never know for sure.

Tina Marie Schultz, co-owner of Post Falls Rosa's Italian Market & Deli had a brilliant idea with her "celebrity menu" promotion. And not just because she asked little old me (celebrity? moi?) to be part of the situation. It seems like a great way to create some unique new menu items and more importantly, for the sake of generating some biz and standing out in the public's mind. I threw some vague ideas at her about mine and she wrote back:

How about I create for you a turkey sandwich where instead of white bread the “stuffing” is what holds the oven roasted turkey, whole cranberry sauce, mayo and sprouts - how about some whipped cream cheese on it also? Then served with kalmata olive stuffed with feta cheese. My M-I-L made a great dressing, that when baked in a loaf pan turned into savory bread that I could slice to serve it. It is made with butter and caramelized onions, whole thyme and evaporated milk, egg and seasonings. If it sounds ok then we can schedule a day for you to come in and try it. We can call it the "Patrick Jacobs – Gobble Me Up Turkey Supreme"  or you can come up with something to name it.

No, Tina. That is absolutely perfect. now whenever anyone pisses me off, instead of telling them to get stuffed, I can just tell them to go eat me. I cannot WAIT to try the sandwich. For the record, other "celebrity" food item honorees so far include Chef Jon Ashton(Today Show/Relish Mag), Kerri Thoreson (columnist/radio), Mark Petersonn (KXLY TV), Post Falls Mayor Clay Larkin, Police Chief Scot Haug, Chuck Buck (Buck Knives), and Jim Thompson (Publisher). Someone call Patty Duke, I will get the vapours and pass out if I end up on the same menu as her.

The idea of frozen yogurt seems as totally '80s to me as legwarmers and Lionel Richie's Jheri curl in the video for "Hello". But all things deeply '80s are bound to make a comeback sooner or later, and perhaps JAMMS Frozen Yogurt (3500 N. Gov't Way near Costco) is riding the crest of that particular wave of hotness. Along with the Gap, Longs Drug, and that one store that sold KISS bongs and feathered roach clips (or clipped in your hair for that ultimate Stevie Nicks effect), my cousin Jenny and I would make frozen yogurt a part of our rounds in 1983 at the Eastridge Mall in San Jose, California. Back then there were only approximately two flavors on tap and the topping options were basically chunky granola or no chunky granola.

Sounds like Jamm's is going to have a bit more to offer than retro vibes. "JAMMS Frozen Yogurt. Enjoy 8 different flavors of frozen yogurt topped with over 45 toppings. You decide the flavor, You decide how much, You decide the topping, You decide how many! JAMMS Frozen Yogurt: "Where You Rule" (tm). Notice the trademark, so don't dare get any ideas about stealing the slogan for the title of your blog post or anything.

Saying there are too many thrift stores in midtown is like saying there's too many shots of vodka in your morning smoothie, so of course it's good news that Good Pickins (802 N. 4th Street) has opened for business near Capone's. Whenever I make my thrift rounds and can't find any treasures at a particular store, I always complain that the place was "totally picked", so hopefully the name of this place is a good omen. Looking at their facebook photos, I'm not betting on it. Yes, I'll give them a break since they just opened, but from what I can see, the place is pretty barren, and does anyone really need to purchase yet another miniature straw hat with fake flowers and ribbon hot-glue-gunned to it? Of course they do, and by the way, the Ronald McDonald doll is mine!


Post Falls' Diner Dad is NOT HAPPY about the new Wendy's fries

The Torch is dead, long live the Torch. Actually, Rendezvous seems like pretty much the same deal: boobies flying, haze of smoke, scariest bathroom on earth, rumors of intra-management scandal, "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails, bar too crowded to get a damn drink, excess testosterone, weak and mysterious test-tube shots, your old drivers ed instructor, a dollar for some ladythighs suddenly thrust around your neck, and Ke$ha's huge rat-girl face projected 10 feet tall on the video screens. Business as usual, see you there.

Long and tan and young and lovely, the Grille From Ipanema won't be making anyone say "ahhh" until later this month, rather than the originally planned December date.

Local bars are getting so creative with their theme night ideas:
Crockpot Cook-Off/Broomstick Pool Tournament at Dinki Di's in Hauser.
Nail Polish, Lip Gloss, and Headbands Super Bowl Party at Mik's in Cd'A.
Whipped Cream, Tattoos, Piercings Oh My!!! at Baja Bargarita in Cd'A.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm sure the Patty Duke will have its good days and its bad days.