Kelly's Irish Pub

Kelly’s Irish Pub
726 N. Fourth St., Coeur d’Alene
(208) 667-1717

“When I die I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs in Dublin.” ~ J. P. Donleavy

An Irish Pub without Guinness is like a discotheque without a DJ. “I’m so sorry, we can’t serve any beer or wine tonight”, apologized the waitress with a hint of exasperation when I walked into Kelly’s Irish Pub to meet the parental units for dinner. The draught drought was actually through no fault of their own; turns out they ran into a snare during the transfer of the beer and wine license, namely the fact that the county is notoriously slower than molasses when it comes to such matters.

More than likely, Kelly’s beer taps will be flowing by the time you read this, but their temporary dry spell was too much to handle for several groups of customers who walked in and did a 360 back out the door after being told of the dire alcohol situation. Too bad for them, for they missed an opportunity to indulge in some of the most spectacular pub food I’ve come across in recent memory if not ever.

Not everyone was fazed by the lack of booze. For a restaurant that had only been open a little over a week, the place was packed with hungry folks, some of them looking like they’d already dabbled in the Kelly’s experience before and had quickly decided to make it a regular haunt. Some of them may have been holdovers from the prior tenant, Grumpy’s, who transformed the former Laundromat of ill repute into a fine dining establishment only a little over a year ago.

There was no need for Kelly’s to do much remodeling, but the décor has changed quite a bit. It looks like the All Things Irish store exploded inside a firehouse, with clovers and leprechauns mingling with memoirs from owner Walter Keith’s years as a fireman back east, including a larger-than-life statue of a hose-wielding firefighter that greets customers at the door.

We were slightly baffled by the large folk-art placard that hangs above the bar with the rather gruesomely un-PC message “Fresh Catch – Dolphin”. Fortunately, dolphin and chips is not among the choices listed on the menu, but nearly everything that was on offer sounded terribly tasty to our rumbling tummies. Kelly’s offers a selection of traditional dinner items, including several fried seafood platters, New York strip steak, and pork loins with potatoes and veggies, but the main attraction is their selection of whimsically named sandwiches.

The “Blarney” is thin-sliced roast beef on sourdough with carmelized onions, horseradish sauce, and melted Swiss and American cheeses. The “Prime Minister” is positively Thatcher-esque in its grandiosity, with prime rib slices, onions and cheese on a hoagie roll and served with a side of rich au-jus. The “Philly” is exactly what it sounds like, and the meaty “Blue” brings together grilled chicken, honey ham, bacon and Swiss on a ciabattta roll. Also desirable and unique is the “Sligo”, which crosses thanksgiving with a summer picnic by mating smoked turkey, cranberry sauce, cole slaw, bacon and two melted cheeses on marbled rye.

Initially, we had the idea of each ordering something different so we could steal bites off each other’s plates. I really had my heart set on trying their signature Reuben sandwich, but my mother had already laid claim to it, so I narrowed it down to a few other options. The “three scoop salad” caught my attention right away with it’s trilogy of homemade chicken, tuna, and shrimp salads served on a bed of greens. The bacon cheddar burger was also howling my name, especially after the waitress sashayed by our table with several of the toweringly huge burgers in hand, but lately I’ve been a little cheeseburgered out.

We had to ask the gentleman at the table next to us what the heck he had ordered after the waitress brought him a miniature mountain of meat covered in white gravy. When he told us it was their open face Rueben, and that it wasn’t gravy but masses of melted Swiss, all ideas about individuality drifted away. “Three Ruebens, please” we said, and our waitress returned amazingly quickly with three very hot, heaping plates of fabulosity.

I’m not a huge fan of rye bread, but I barely noticed its presence under the piles of tender homemade corned beef and sauerkraut. The dollop of 1000 island dressing that lurked under all that cheese was enough to send me straight into flavor heaven. Seriously, run don’t walk immediately to Kelly’s and try this divine sandwich yourself, as I’m quite unable to summon words flowery enough to describe its glory with any justice.

Our meals were so huge that all three of us made it only about halfway though before our full stomachs started waving the white flag of surrender. Still, it was impossible to say no to New York cheesecake, and we were glad we didn’t because it was incredible, light and fluffy like its supposed to be but rarely actually is. The service was fantastic as well, so much so that we almost expected them to offer to bring our cars around to the front door as we were leaving. Valet service or not, Guinness or not, I predict that Kelly’s Irish Pub will swiftly rise to the top of the list of local diners’ favorite destination eateries.

St. Patrick's Day Parade & Bar Hop

St. Patrick’s Day Means Parades and Parties in Downtown CDA

I’ve always found it to be rather vexatious when folks don’t really go for the green on St. Patrick’s Day. They pad their way blearily through the closet that morning and pull out clothing in unsightly shades of sea foam, olive or chartreuse, and probably think “eh, close enough”. Or they dress head-to-toe in every color of the rainbow other than green, and then don some kind of miniscule accessory in Ireland’s trademark color, like a fuzzy shamrock pin purchased last year during a Hallmark clearance sale, or even worse they say “My underwear is green today”. This tidbit of information not only paints uncomfortable mind pictures, it will likely be seen as “too much” for all but one’s most intimate companions or perhaps emergency care technicians. They’ll wear just enough of a hint of pseudo-green to avoid the sharp pinching fingers of traditionalists.

Certainly, those who really take St. Paddy’s Day to heart know that only bold, bright true green will do the trick, and it should be worn loudly and proudly. However, when getting the kids dressed, be careful not to go overboard with the idea. In Ireland, the color was long considered to be unlucky; the favorite color of the Fairy Shoemakers who liked nothing better than to snatch away children wearing too much green. It’s better to be safe than sorry, but realistically, unless you reside near certain metropolitan boutique districts, Fairy Shoemakers are a very minor concern in modern times. If you decide to bring the family out to downtown Coeur d’Alene today at 4 o’clock for the annual St.Patrick’s Day Parade, it might be prudent to bring an Irish Fairy Swatter just in case.

If such an item could actually be purchased, All Things Irish on Sherman Avenue would likely be a great place to begin searching for it. If you want tacky paper-and-foil shamrocks, you’d better stick to the dollar store. All Things Irish owner Ilene Moss carries high quality merchandise straight from the land of Eire, including wool capes, Catholic trinkets, Celtic rugs, jewelry, fine art and ceramics. She will also rent you a kilt, but what you wear underneath is fully your decision. The shop serves as a kind of spiritual home base for the St. Patrick’s Day Parade which begins up the street at 11^th Street and ends a mile down Sherman Avenue near the Museum of North Idaho.

This year marks the third run of the parade, and although it’s a fairly new tradition in town, it’s already become a local favorite, giving folks a chance to experience the thrill of dusting off the folding lawn chairs and enjoying early springtime in the shadow of a high-rise condo. A real highlight each year is the twirling drumsticks and bagpipes of Sandpoint’s St. Joseph’s School Band, which are either heart-stirring or stomach churning, depending on your tolerance level for the droning wind instruments. Regardless, the green, blue, and black tartan-clad marching band always leaves the crowd misty-eyed, causing even those natives of Swaziland or Guam in attendance to long for the mothering shores of Ireland and cheer wildly. Other notable entries from previous years have included various local radio personalities, colorful charity floats, scads of pug dogs and leprechauns chasing police cars, and best of all, giant dancing bottles of Guinness beer.

Ah, Guinness. For many, it’s the embodiment of what makes St. Patrick’s Day worth celebrating. Its distinctive flavor comes from the roasted barley which remains unfermented, resulting in a rich flavor I like to describe as “chocolatey”. The Iron Horse is a fantastic place to order your first cold, heady Guinness of the evening and if you get there in time, you can even watch the parade go by from the comfort of the lounge. Crowds tend to get wild early at the Horse, and the staff has plans to make the place as festive as possible on parade day, with traditional Irish music setting the ambience, and heaps of Corned Beef and Cabbage to help soak up the dark beer. Since it’s a Saturday, they’ll be serving their usual two-for-one drinks. Stick around into the evening and dance to the party sounds of cover band Ultraglide. If you still haven’t had your fill of Irish shenanigans tonight, you can relive the whole affair this Monday the 17^th, when they do the whole thing over again with a DJ in lieu of live music.

Naturally, O’Shay’s Irish Pub on the east end of town on Lake Coeur d’Alene Drive is really getting into things, with a celebration that kicks off today with a big hearty “O’Breakfast” and the season opening of the beer garden and amphitheater. Fresh from dazzling parade goers, the St. Joseph’s Band will perform, followed by local favorites the Burlap Highrise, who I’d guess will be throwing in some old-country Irish elements in with their rustic Americana-tinged rock music. The O’Shays menu is like St.Paddy’s Day every day, so it’s no stretch at all to expect the Guinness Stew, Corned Beef & Cabbage, and Fish & Chips to be nearly as good as a trip to a Dublin eatery. The music, food, and good times continue at O’Shays through Monday.

It doesn’t really matter to the naughty Leprechaun if he has to work bright and early the next morning, he’s going to put on his best green floppy hat and celebrate St Paddy’s the way it was meant to be celebrated: bar-hopping. Along with the aforementioned Iron Horse and O’Shay’s, the Fort Ground Grill will be treating revelers all day long Monday to plenty of stout Irish ale, corned beef, and an evening bagpipe performance. “The Fort Ground has always been a St Patrick’s Day tradition in Coeur d’Alene,” says owner Steve Widmyer, “Stop by for a green beer!”

Also on the party list is Capone’s Pub on 4^th street in midtown, where according to featured entertainers the Million $ Hillbilly Band, it’ll be “foot stompin’, Irish drinkin’, and more fun than the British parliament deems legal.” Music starts at 7 p.m. The Shore Lounge in the lobby level of the Resort is also throwing a St.Patrick’s Night bash, with drink specials, a DJ spinning Irish tunes (U2 dance mixes perhaps?), and plenty of tourist commingling.

After bar hopping, the tispy Leprechaun is most likely to end up settling in for the night at Mik-n-Mac’s Lounge on 4th where DJ Jason will be completely ignoring Ireland and will instead get everyone dancing to current and retro hip-hop and club hits. The fair maidens behind the bar have promised to keep the crowd juiced up on martinis, green beers and insane drink specials like the Irish Trash Can, a wicked concoction of Rum, Gin, Vodka, Triple Sec, Peach Schnapps, and Blue Curaco, with a full can of Red Bull floating atop. Whoa. More than one of those bad boys and the naughty Leprechaun will wake up the next morning looking as green as his best floppy hat.